On big life changes

Dear Dad,

Yesterday, while driving, I saw one of those light-up road signs. “CAUTION” it flashed, and then just “CHANGE AHEAD.” I thought how fitting that was right now.

As you know, I’ve just taken a new job, and it’s absolutely a dream. I’m working creatively and in academia and I’m completely thrilled by the level of enthusiasm and commitment to education of my coworkers. But my decision to take this job wasn’t without sacrifices. When the position was offered to me, it would mean leaving the county I grew up in, leaving my friends, and leaving my boyfriend.

tom and vicki

This goob right here is so supportive.

We talked about the decision, and the distance, and even though he told me again and again he would miss me, my partner also told me that he knew what a big opportunity this was for me, and that he was happy for me. And I knew that I didn’t want to surrender my career for a relationship. So we’re working it out long-distance.

My boss found out this week that we’ve been dating a little less than a year, and her response was, “Wow, that’s amazing. Not many people would leave a new relationship for a job.”

And that’s been the dilemma for a lot of women for a very long time now. Many women do give up their careers for their husbands and their families, or limit their opportunities for their partners. For decades, the big question in the media for career women has been, “Can women balance work and home life?”

I’m grateful that women’s rights have advanced to the point where I have good job opportunities and can pursue the path I want. And I’m grateful to my partner for understanding and valuing my achievements. I’m hopeful that soon all women will be supported in their endeavors, be they in the work field or the family field. I know for me, my partner’s support has meant the world in this big change.



2 thoughts on “On big life changes

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