On some sexist screed in Thought Catalog

Ugh, Dad. Excuse me while I seethe for a bit. I just read some hateful screed on Thought Catalog. Yes, that Thought Catalog.

The article doesn’t start promisingly, with the title “How Feminism Disempowers Women.” So you don’t have to read it, I’ve summed it up. The author’s gist is this: In the good old days, and in countries where the evils of feminism haven’t taken root yet, women are WAY better off. Men are men, and the ladies keep their legs together until the men have bought them enough chicken dinners for marriage. Happily ever after. In “Western” countries, unfortunately, women will just put out for any mildly entertaining man who buys them a cup of coffee. So now, sure, we can have careers,  but no one is marrying rich businessmen boo hoo.

There are a couple things wrong with this article, all of which make me a little nauseous. I’ve made you a list:

1. Women are not sex machines into which you put kindness tokens (and actually money, according to the author) until they put sex out. Feminism has not lowered the cost of these sex machines.

2. This article ignores that women have their own bodily autonomy. In its rose-colored-glasses view of pre-feminist Western culture, it seems to forget that women were still harassed, assaulted and raped by strangers, suitors and husbands (apparently in countries without feminism, everyone just holds hands until marriage).

3. Apparently feminism is tearing down gender roles (which I agree with) which means that naturally masculine men and naturally feminine women aren’t allowed to be themselves. This is just wrong! The feminism I believe in says, “Hey, everyone, do you. Want to wear a flower crown? Go for it! Want to play rugby? Rock on! Gender doesn’t matter! Follow your heart!”

4. Finally, the author says sure, women have careers and cash flow, but shucks, they don’t have a love life! And honestly, my love life has not always been great. But I love the higher education I’ve received, I love my jobs, and I love the income I earn. I can deal with being single. I’m following my dreams. (Also apparently men are super easy to come by, according to the author.)

If there’s one upside to articles like this, it’s that for me, they do the exact opposite of what the author intended. Instead of denouncing the evils of women’s lib, I’m reminded how much good has been accomplished, and how much more there is to do. Women can now report spousal rape, instead of it being their husband’s right. Children are being encouraged to pursue the gender presentation they are comfortable with, instead of being forced into rigid standards. And women are climbing higher than ever before, as we discuss breaking the “highest, hardest glass ceiling.”

Anyway, I gotta go wash the ick off me from reading that article. Hope I’ve given you something to be hopeful about.

Love,

Victoria

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4 thoughts on “On some sexist screed in Thought Catalog

  1. Hello Victoria,

    I think you missed the point of that article. The point is that feminism gave women something from one pocket to the other pocket.

    You gained economical independence, but you lost all your power and your respect in your relationships. Quality men (ie , not desperate losers) are not interested in investing their time and commitment in women. Don’t pretend your love life is not important, because it is to every human beings on the planet.

    Also, regarding #3, you need to get real. Feminism does not make all choices equal. A woman who wants to stay home and raise the kids is greatly ridiculed by her peers in today’s society. She is called lazy, gold digger, etc. She is greatly disrespected. Don’t buy into feminism propaganda without questioning it.

    For #1, western men don’t put kindness coins or money in women, they put sexy coins and pressure coins to get the lay as fast as possible, then goes to the next. Is it better or worse? It’s better when you’re young and want to have fun. It’s worse when you’re older and want something serious, because in the western game all that matters is looking good and sexy.

    You might be young and fresh right now so you don’t care, but don’t forget that when you hit 30 years old you won’t be able to compete with the 20 years old girls who play the same game as you and are just better at it. You will start feeling the claws of loneliness and reality hitting you hard.

    • First off, you’re not my father, and it’s more than a little creepy that you would use that name to comment.

      As for women sacrificing respect in romantic relationships in exchange for respect in the workplace, you seem to have a crucial misunderstanding of the goals of feminism. And if a man won’t respect me because I dare to get an education and have a job, he’s not quality. He’s misogynist trash. Quality men view women as people, not sex objects. Quality men don’t believe that women have to fit some sort of standard to earn their basic respect.

      The GOAL of feminism is to make all choices positive for a woman. Obviously we’re not there yet, since you seem to think that since I want to pursue a career as a writer, I don’t deserve respect as a woman.

      Your sexism, unfortunately, hurts men just as much as it does women, with your narrow view of men who want to get laid quickly and don’t believe that women are their equals. Believe it or not, there are men in the world who give women their time, attention, respect and affection. There are men who see women as equals, as human beings. You’re just not one of them.

      Finally, you know nothing about my love life or my relationships. And I would never want to date someone who bought into patriarchal standards that place a woman’s value in her youth and beauty.

      • “The GOAL of feminism is to make all choices positive for a woman.”

        That’s not true, this is just their claim, just like politicians who run for office and promise the moon and the sun. You’re repeating their propaganda words for words without questioning them. Their actual goal is to elevate certain kind of women (career oriented women) above other kind of women (family women and mothers) and above the rest men.

        “Believe it or not, there are men in the world who give women their time, attention, respect and affection. There are men who see women as equals, as human beings. You’re just not one of them.”

        These men you’re talking about are not male feminists. Get real girl. Those male feminists you think respect you kiss your ass all day long just in the hopes of getting laid one day, but they’re just too cowardly to admit it. They don’t respect you or care about you one bit, in fact they probably hate you because they’re frustrated.

        As for me, I want sex from women from the start, and I’m honest about it. I don’t play games, I don’t lie, and I want to take care of my woman. That’s how you respect a woman, not by being a wormy weak little liar who will tell them everything they want to hear in the hopes of getting laid.

        I see women as human beings, but I accept reality as it is. And reality is, women are not men, and shouldn’t be treated like men. This is not cultural, this is biological, and no amount of protestation will change that. Deal with it. If you and your feminist friends continue to keep and spread these lies around, you will be hurting a lot of men and women down the road, and youre already are.

      • You can keep telling yourself that, but again:

        You don’t understand feminism. You don’t respect women. Nor do you respect men. You don’t know the first thing about my friends.

        I’m done feeding the troll.

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